The Modern Couple.

I spent 8 hours at school today. 3 hours was spent in class. Probably about 2 hours, at least, was spent in the cafeteria and throughout, I thought a lot. Mostly I thought about all my physical displacements between Tampere and Helsinki and somewhere along that though-path, numerous couples popped into my mind and I realized that relationships everywhere are facing very different challenges than those our parents once faced. It seems to me, though I am probably exposed to a more limited or specific base, that couples are changing... and it is because of this that I came up with the concept of "The modern couple."

Just the generations X and Y and Z, the baby boomers and other segments, the modern couple has implications that may be familiar to some, but overall new in terms of blanket meanings. (That sentence didn't make much sense but I'm too tired to fix it. Alas, I have more explications that should clarify.)

Now what I mean by the modern couple is specifically: geographical separation. Although there are still lots of couples that may live and work in the same city, this is not always the case. People are moving around more for work, school, family or just a change of scenery. For example, people may be in the same city for university, 8 months a year, but summertime may mean having to go home to your respective cities. In Canada, you may well both be Canadian but the country is pretty big and you may find yourselves bound to two different oceans/sides of the continent. In Finland, I've met many couples who are from different cities, though they may live together now... or couples in which one person is from abroad. The combinations are endless! This has great implications for an open-minded world and as cultures are mixing, thinking about the future is making me more and more excited. How will this shape the world over the course of this century? Surely this will have to impact how we think about cultures, religion, nations, manners, etc.

Now there are other considerations too, and specifically, this is what I pondered today somewhere between (during) class and lunch. Even if you both live in Toronto, chances are that you'll have to spend some time apart at one point. It seems to almost be a given these days! Maybe I'm thinking that this happens to everyone because every couple I could think of had/has/will have to experience this at some point. Humans are curious and it's becoming possible to satisfy that curiosity and move around a lot. This could mean spending a semester abroad without your boy/girlfriend. Or it could mean taking them with you. Or it could mean you both go aboard at the same time to different places. Or it could mean you go abroad at different times to different places, or the same place!

Adapting is not always easy. And people have asked me: why move to Finland and then have to move away from Tampere? Well my friends, this is a good question. As humans, and especially as a woman in my case, we are constantly adapting to changes all around. This means learning a new language, getting used to colder/hotter temperatures, learning customs and traditions, partaking in celebrations, seeing your family less often, making new family ties, meeting new, different people, eating new food, cooking new food, exploring different music, getting a new hobby... I think I could go on forever but you can refer to the rest of the blog for other examples. The point is, some aspects of adapting are easier than others. This all depends on you and where your comfort zone lies. But most importantly, you have to realize that you need to adapt in the right way. Aka. sitting in your apartment crying for 3 years is not adapting...obviously (and this can happen if you go about it the wrong way... and no this did not happen to me). You need to feel great in all aspects of your life! And by great, I mean fulfilled, so that is why, I went back to school and that is why I'm taking full advantage of the situation to meet lots of great people and get involved at school. I am really excited about what this year, and this degree, will bring!

So really what I'm trying to say is that: I believe that striving for all that fulfillment, including relationships with anyone and everyone, is an important part of living... (even the Sims know that haha.) I say this because I've also been asked: "couldn't you find a boyfriend closer to home?" and ironically, that was never a thought that I asked myself! haha. And I'm happy I didn't because that's just not how my brain works. (Ok, ok, I'm trying to get to my point but I do enjoy babbling so much) The point is that modern couples are pushing boundaries and stretching limits all over the place. And that no matter what the outcome in the end, the lessons learned along the way and the struggles endured with strengthen and shape you and those around you in all sorts of positive ways.

(Yes this was really bias. And by long distances, I also mean a 30 minute drive apart. It's all about how you think about it. And none of this is to say that you can't date your neighbour! I was just thinking very specifically.)